[quote style=”boxed”]If you’re afraid of ‘no’ or afraid of failure, that feeling will not disappear overnight. Learn to challenge your fears – Andrea Waltz[/quote]failure is good

Is it actually possible to become successful by being a complete failure?

For the longest time, i’ve always worked hard for success. It was such a big ambition of mine that I would often try to prevent myself from making any mistakes and that if I did, I would consider myself a complete failure.

This is no coincidence because it is often taught by society that failing is bad and that if we are unsuccessful, we are basically destined to be that way for the remainder of our lives. This notion plagued me during school where I would often get bullied by my peers and get told how I would ‘be a complete failure at life’ and not become the person i’ve always dreamed of becoming.

Little did I know at the time how right they actually were. Because the more I got into personal development over the years and the more I focused on personal growth, the more I started to realize that failure is good. And that if I were to become a better person, I would have to experience failure in every aspect of my life if I were to improve it in any way.

Having read so few books on this very topic, I recently came across one having been recommended it by Bob Burg in a recent interview.

Go for No

Written by ‘Richard Fenton’ and ‘Andrea Waltz’. ‘Go for No’ tells the story of a 28 year old copier salesman ‘Eric James Bratton’, who awakens one morning to be confronted by his older self. What he learns from his older self is a very basic yet profound concept:

In order to succeed, we must be willing to fail often.

What really caught my attention was just how small the book actually was in size. On first glance, I wondered what could actually be written in such a short book. But upon reading it, it was evidently clear why it was written the way it was. Andrea and Richard cunningly compiled the book as a short story, exactly like Bob Burg’s book, which in my opinion was a good choice. It is said that we often learn the most through direct exposure to something.

The one thing I noticed was just how similar the main character seemed to be with who I am which made it easier to understand and relate to the story. I seemed to recall on multiple occasions how I would have responded and reacted in exactly the same way as Eric did with his older and wiser self.

Being a 28 year old at this time of writing, I have often wondered whether I am too old to be successful or whether i’ve passed my prime years to actually make a mark in the world. What this book reminds me is that in 10 years from now, who I can be could potentially be much wiser, stronger and more successful as the person I am today.

In terms of failure, there’s a really great page dedicated to the ‘5 failure levels’, which Eric noticed was pinned on his future self’s wall.

Here’s a video review of the book where I go on to talk about the 5 failure levels in detail.


Having read the book multiple times now, it’s become evidently clear that failure is nothing to be afraid of and that in order to experience happiness and success, we must be willing to face our fears directly, which most of the time relates to our fear of rejection or the ability to fail.

How awesome would it be if we were to finally overcome this issue!

The Interview

The most obvious move after reading the book was to actually reach out to Andrea personally and ask her for a formal interview to discuss her thoughts on the book. What I really enjoyed about interviewing Andrea was just how easy she was to talk to and noticed the passion she had for this very topic. I could have easily spoken to her for much longer, but due to the pressures of time, had to keep the interview short and concise for the benefit of the viewers watching.

A lot of topics were covered based on the story, from how the concept of the story came about to what her thoughts were about the concept of failing.

For the complete video interview, be sure to watch the video below.


Having had the pleasure to have interviewed Andrea, I had taken away key nuggets of advice she had mentioned within the interview, which i’ll now list below.

  • We will always face challenges of failure and rejection, even if we think we’ve mastered them. In order to increase the possibility of success, we have to be willing to face failure and rejection directly.
  • Learning to fail can be as simple as switching focus. Instead of focusing to succeed, focus on failing and set goals to fail a certain number of times.
  • Learn to fail fast and with as many people as possible. The more you experience failure, the more you’ll eventually learn.
  • Remove your ‘EGO’ from failure. The less attached you are to the concept of failing, the easier it will be moving forward.
  • We have been programmed to see failure negatively. Unlearn what you know and start to see failure as a learning tool.
  • Understand that this is all a journey and that with every journey, we must be willing to take risks in order to see rewards.

Conclusion

‘Go for No’ has far exceeded my expectations. Not because of it’s easy reading, but because of it’s ability to explain a powerful concept in a way that anybody can pick up and understand. I have no reservations in recommending this book to my younger cousins or to someone who is currently experiencing problems and looking for a fresh perspective. And for that, I give this book my seal of approval.

For more information about Andrea and Richard, please visit their website, which I’ve included a link to below:

www.goforno.com

Resources In The Video

[unordered_list style=”tick”]

  • Go for No! Yes is the Destination, No is How You Get There: Written by Richard Fenton and Andrea Waltz. The book tells the story of a 28 year old copier salesman ‘Eric James Bratton’, who upon falling asleep wakes up to be confronted with his future self and learns a powerful concept.
[/unordered_list]

What did you do to overcome rejection? Please leave your comments below…

Lifestyle


Onder Hassan
Onder Hassan

Onder is the founder of Dawn of Change. He spends most of his time in the discovery of his own potential, building his self-confidence and using his experiences to share and teach others how to do the same.

    7 replies to "The Key Secret Society Doesn’t Want You To Know About Failure – An Interview With ‘Andrea Waltz’"

    • Tom Dixon

      Great information Onder! I had to laugh about your comment regarding your age. Let me tell you at 28 your best years are note behind you – they are ahead of you. I wasn’t familiar with this book, but will have to check it out, I like how you included a video interview with the author…great stuff.

      • Onder Hassan

        Thanks Tom 🙂
        I guess you’re right. It’s easy to feel old when you were younger a few years prior. But then the same could be true 10 years from now, so I guess I should take that as a lesson 🙂
        Someone once said that your 20’s are your adult adolescence period, which I think they’re right. I’m just about getting to grips with the fact that i’m now an adult lol
        Definitely get hold of it. It’s a great book and a very easy read. It can be read in an afternoon.

    • Hiten Vyas

      Hi Onder,

      I loved your interview with Andrea. It was very inspiring. I could resonate with so much that Andrea said. One approach which I have used in my own life, which Andrea mentioned, is actually seeking no. I’ve done this in my professional life when doing sales. Doing so, enabled me to let go fear and treat the experience as an experiment, in which I had a specific outcome, which of course was hearing no. However, after hearing some no’s a few times, pretty soon I started to hear yes a lot!

      Thank you.

      • Onder Hassan

        Thanks Hiten,
        Yes, it’s an awesome tactic because it changes your focus. The minute you focus on ‘No’s’ instead of ‘yes’s’ suddenly success becomes more frequent and fulfilling. It’s something i’ve been doing myself recently.
        In the past, I would go into something with high expectations, only to feel disappointed if it didn’t work out.

        Now I simply try my best but don’t expect anything from it. It’s a great way to detach yourself from outcome 🙂
        I’m glad you liked the interview.

    • Nick

      That was a great interview, Onder, I’m impressed!

      ‘Instead of focusing to succeed, focus on failing and set goals to fail a certain number of times.’ – I’ve found this to be helpful, and out of the ways I’ve tried to embrace failure this has likely been the most productive of them. I haven’t fully overcome it, but the improvements are there, and the journey is where the fun lies!

      It’s funny you mention the ego thing, for I think there’s another side to the coin as well. I’ve heard many people who boost their ego because of failing, especially when it comes to grades in school or something, perhaps that’s even worse than the ego drop, who knows!

      Thanks Onder, have a brilliant day!

      • Onder Hassan

        Thanks Nick!
        You make a good point about the Ego thing when failing. I was like that in a lot of ways back in school and would often work harder the minute someone told me I would fail. So I would strive for success with that motivation in mind in order to prove people wrong lol
        It really depends how you frame things and what your beliefs are. Belief is really important in the whole grand scheme of things.

    • Minecraft Games

      Very impressive article. I have read each and every point
      and found it very interesting

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